Single Golfer Funny in With Crowd Meme Championship
50 Greatest Golf Quotes of All Time
Streeter Lecka/Getty Images
There is an old adage about sports writing that goes something like this: The smaller the ball, the better the writing.
When you have one of the oldest sports of all-time—if not the oldest—you get a lot of time for some truly great quotes.
There have been some fascinating characters in the world of golf over the years. From Old Tom Morris, to Walter Hagan, to Arnold Palmer; the sport has had its share of interesting ambassadors.
The thing about golf is that you don't have to be a professional golfer to love the game.
In the next 50 slides you'll find quotes from authors, actors, comedians, presidents and even a king, among others.
Winston Churchill
St. Andrews shown Warren Little/Getty Images
"Golf is a game whose aim is to hit a very small ball into an even smaller hole, with weapons singularly ill-designed for the purpose."
John Updike
David Cannon/Getty Images
"Golf appeals to the idiot in us and the child. Just how childlike golfers become is proven by their frequent inability to count past five."
Arnold Palmer
Stephen Dunn/Getty Images
"I have a tip that can take five strokes off anyone's golf game: It's called an eraser."
Ted Ray
Stuart Franklin/Getty Images
"Golf is a fascinating game. It has taken me nearly 40 years to discover that I can't play it."
P.J. O'Rourke
"Golf combines two favorite American pastimes; taking long walks and hitting things with a stick."
Unknown Author
Stephen Dunn/Getty Images
"When I die, bury me on the golf course so my husband will visit."
Bob Ryan
Chris McGrath/Getty Images
"A passion, an obsession, a romance, a nice acquaintanceship with trees, sand and water."
Pete Dye
Marc Serota/Getty Images
"The ardent golfer would play Mount Everest if somebody put a flagstick on top."
Lee Trevino
Tony Duffy/Getty Images
"If you're caught on a golf course during a storm and are afraid of lightning, hold up a 1-iron. Not even God can hit a 1-iron."
Gerald Ford
Gary Newkirk/Getty Images
"I know I am getting better at golf because I'm hitting fewer spectators."
Lee Trevino
Getty Images/Getty Images
"My swing is so bad, I look like a caveman killing his lunch."
Tommy Armour
Stuart Franklin/Getty Images
"Golf is an awkward set of bodily contortions designed to produce a graceful result."
Paul Harvey
Stuart Franklin/Getty Images
"Golf is a game in which you yell 'fore', shoot six and write down five."
Chi Chi Rodriguez
A. Messerschmidt/Getty Images
"Golf is the most fun you can have without taking your clothes off."
Bruce Lansky
Scott Halleran/Getty Images
"On a recent survey, 80 percent of golfers admitted cheating. The other 20 percent lied."
Mark Twain
"It is good sportsmanship not to pick up lost balls while they are still rolling."
Billy Graham
"The only time my prayers are never answered is on the golf course."
Bob Hope
George Rose/Getty Images
"If you watch a game, it's fun. If you play it, it's recreation. If you work at it, it's golf."
King George V
Andrew Redington/Getty Images
"Golf always makes me so damned angry."
Although King George V is not shown in the photo, we thought a picture of fellow-countryman Lee Westwood would be a nice alternative.
Ray Floyd
Stephen Dunn/Getty Images
"They call it golf because all the other four letter words were taken."
Gary Player
Getty Images/Getty Images
"The more I practice, the luckier I get."
Chi Chi Rodriguez
Gregory Shamus/Getty Images
"I read the greens in Spanish, but I putt in English."
Ben Hogan
Getty Images/Getty Images
"The most important shot in golf is the next one."
Lee Trevino
Darren Carroll/Getty Images
"The older I get, the better I used to be."
Arnold Palmer
Getty Images/Getty Images
"Concentration comes out of a combination of confidence and hunger."
Heywood Hale Broun
Stuart Franklin/Getty Images
"Golf is not, on the whole, a game for realists. By its exactitude's of measurements, it invites the attention of perfectionists."
Bob Hope
Steve Grayson/Getty Images
"Isn't it fun to go out on the course and lie in the sun?"
Fred Funk taking a little rest in the photo.
Percey Boomer
Andrew Redington/Getty Images
"If you wish to hide your character, do not play golf."
Ian Poulter in the photo, a golfer who definitely wears his emotions on his sleeve.
Unknown Author
Stuart Franklin/Getty Images
"Golf can best be defined as an endless series of tragedies obscured by the occasional miracle."
Sergio Garcia with one of those occasional miracles.
David Brenner
Sam Greenwood/Getty Images
"I don't like watching golf on TV. I can't stand whispering."
Harry Vardon
Chris Keane/Getty Images
"Don't play too much golf. Two rounds a day are plenty."
John Updike
Stephen Dunn/Getty Images
"The golf swing is like a suitcase into which we are trying to pack one too many things."
Tiger Woods shown in photo, who has been trying to unload his suitcase of late as he reinvents his swing.
Dave Marr
Andrew Redington/Getty Images
"Golf's three ugliest words: Still your shot."
A not-so-happy Darren Clarke in the photo.
Jack Nicklaus
Stuart Franklin/Getty Images
"The older you get, the stronger the wind gets; and it's always in your face."
Bobby Jones
"I never learned anything from a match that I won."
Patty Berg
Chris Keane/Getty Images
"The more you play it, the less you know about it."
William Wordsworth
Darren Carroll/Getty Images
"Golf is a day spent in a round of strenuous idleness."
Paula Creamer in the photo.
Sam Snead
David Cannon/Getty Images
"If a lot of people gripped a knife and fork the way they do a golf club, they'd starve to death."
Unknown Author
Donald Miralle/Getty Images
"Golf is a lot of walking, broken up by disappointment and bad arithmetic."
Martha Beckman
Ezra Shaw/Getty Images
"Man blames fate for other accidents, but feels personally responsible for a hole in one."
Bernhard Langer in the photo.
Unkown Author
Donald Miralle/Getty Images
"Golf is life. If you can't take golf, you can't take life."
Anna Rawson in photo.
Old Tom Morris
David Cannon/Getty Images
"We were all born with webbed feet and a golf club in our hand." (Referring to people born on the east coast of Scotland.)
John Daly
Ian Walton/Getty Images
"I believe nicotine plus caffeine equals protein."
Carl Spackler
Ezra Shaw/Getty Images
"Correct me if I'm wrong, Sandy, but if I kill all the golfers they'll lock me and up and throw away the key."
Chris Perry
Warren Little/Getty Images
"The worst club in my bag is my brain."
Jack Benny
Dave Martin/Getty Images
"Give me the fresh air, a beautiful partner, and a nice round of golf, and you can keep the fresh air and the round of golf."
Robert Lynd
Stephen Dunn/Getty Images
"It is almost impossible to remember how tragic a place this world is when one is playing golf."
Horace G. Hutchinson
Warren Little/Getty Images
"If profanity had an influence on the flight of the ball, the game of golf would be played far better than it is."
Peter Hanson in the photo, trying to reshape his putter.
Jack Nicklaus
David Cannon/Getty Images
"I think I fail a bit less than everyone else."
Mark Twain
"Golf is a good walk spoiled."
Source: https://bleacherreport.com/articles/540759-50-greatest-golf-quotes-of-all-time
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